Well as much as I hate to say it, the depression is back. Can't seem to shake it on my own. Will talk to the Dr. about a medication change. I don't like the idea of it but I can't go on like this everyday. Saw pictures on Jamie's blog of the pictures taken of the children. They are so adorable. I wish I could see them everyday but that is unrealistic. I have a doctors appt. for my diabetes today. I am not in good control of my glucose levels so we will see what he has to say about it and what to do.

Went to order my new glasses today. Decided to also get some sunglasses. Even with my insurance; $338.00.  Ouch!!  Stephanie took me. She is such a wonderful daughter and I am so blessed to have her in my life. Talked to Stacey yesterday. She sounds good and seems to be doing well with her pregnancy despite minor glitches here and there. I miss her so much and wish she were closer. Brian and Jamie have been struggling with the boys vomiting and having diahhrea. (Sorry, I don't know how to spell that) I'm hoping they feel better so we can see them this week.  I'm so grateful to Brian for doing our taxes. He is so busy and I know it was hard for him to find the time to go through it. He is a wonderful husband, father and son. My A/C is finally on in the house so I'm not such a grumpy person. I know Michael appreciates it for that reason alone!

Today has been a long, solemn day. Michael's mother has been diagnosed with terminal cancer and doesn't have long to live.  We are all just trying to process it. I miss my grandkids. Brian was going to bring them over today but haven't seen them. We sang a song in church called, "Where Can I Turn for Peace?" It just reminded me that our Heavenly Father and Jesus are always there for us. We only have to seek them out. I'm very fortunate to have such a testimony. I miss my mom and dad. Talked to my sister, Vickie, yesterday. We had a nice talk. Also, her son, Jason with his wife, Marcy, brought over their 2 little ones, Dallas and Emily. It was great to see them. Friday and Saturday I planted and weeded myself into very sore muscles! I am so blessed to have the family and friends that I do. 

I just finished reading all of my past posts. I felt so nostalgic reading the responses and grateful for such loved ones. Today is a sad day. I spoke with Mary yesterday and Mom is not doing well. The Dr. says her cancer has spread from the tumor in her lung to her lymph nodes, liver and probably to her bones. She is on her way to IL today to be with her when she sees the Dr. on Thurs. the 19th. Michael is having a really hard time. I wish I could be there for Mary, Mom, and Pat. We don't know how much time she has left but, I don't think it will be very long. It is rainy today so just staying in the house. Tomorrow I have a Dr's. appt for my cpap. My good friend, Evelyn Beck, will be taking me since I still can't drive. She has been a godsend. I don't even feel like getting dressed today.

New beginnings

True joy comes from recognizing the power within each one of us to make this life a happy one despite our trials. I am back on this after 4 years. Stephanie helped me to find it again. The last 6 years have been hard. Many pitfalls and not much memory of any of it. Diagnosed with bipolar disorder. Two hospital stays. One just this past January. Doing better now. I have the most wonderful family and am so blessed. Looking forward to posting on this much more often. There is much to catch up on. Please let me know if you see this. Love to all.